Things I did on my Vacation – Day 2

And it came to pass that, though wearied by the epic battle with the Dustbunnies of Unusual Size, the fair Lady Kate was determined to defeat the evils that lurked in the Bathrooms Where Angels Fear To Tread (one of them demons fear to tread, too). Thus, she armed herself with the Cleaners of Righteousness and began her battle. With the Dread Beasts of Grime in one bathroom safely vanquished, the fair Lady Kate did need to transport her beloved Sir Tom’s faithful steed to the Young Men of Pep and Vigor for fresh saddle-oil.

Alas! The Young Men of Pep and Vigor lacked that most civilized of virtues, timeliness, and thus though the Lady and brought the faithful steed at the time appointed, an hour passed and half again ere the fair Lady Kate could return to her battles with the Evils of Uncleanliness.

But the fair Lady was not deterred, for was she not a warrior maid of the finest steel? And so it was that the terrible Stairwell of Doom was vanquished, its beasts of fierce kitteh-fur slain and their dusty remains disposed of ere long (though she did have to stop several times to sharpen the Sword of Vacuum once more).

Finally, the Fair Lady did venture into the lair of the Bathroom Where Angels (and Demons) Fear To Tread. Lo! though her muscles did tremble with weariness, the Sink of Despair was quickly restored to sparkling cleanliness, and the Toilet of Horror transformed into something one might choose to sit upon.

And then did the true horror of the Bathroom Where Angels (and Demons) Fear To Tread reveal itself, for Lo! the Fair Lady Kate did discover the terrible secret of this place, the source of the lurking miasma that haunted her days.

It was… yes… The Super Secret Kitteh Bad Pee Place.

Though despair blackened her heart, the Fair Lady Kate did not quail at the dread discovery. Nay, she did fetch unto herself more cleaning supplies and begin the greatest battle of all. But the Fair Lady was wearied, and the hour late, and her arms could not reach so far, so at last she retreated, defeated for now, but determined to continue the battle one she had procured that arcane device, a long-handled scrubbing brush.


Things I did on my Vacation – Day 1

The day dawned bright (actually it didn’t, it dawned bleak, wet, gray, and cold, but let’s go with this for the purposes of narrative, shall we?) and the Fair Lady Kate did spring forth (yeah, like heck she did) and gird her loins for the dread battle to come.

No ordinary battle, this: the Fair Lady sought to vanquish the legions of Dustbunnies Of Unusual Size, dread beasts that have terrorized the folk of the realm for years uncounted (this part is true. If you ever have to choose between Dustbunnies of Unusual Size and Rodent of Unusual Size, go with the ROUSs. They’re much less vicious). And so, wielding the Broom of Righteousness did the Fair Lady Kate go forth unto battle.

The long, grim battle did rage all the day, until at last the final dread Dustbunny was slain.

And the Fair Lady Kate did think, “Oh bugger. Tomorrow is cleaning the Bathrooms Where Angels Fear To Tread.”